Thursday, July 4, 2013

Crushed by Candy...or ...Enough with the Requests Already

Crushed by Candy,
            Confusion takes a stranglehold of the young girls breath as she tries to open her eyes and sees only the darkness.
            Darkness is the onlything that seems to be constant at the moment. Her little fingers rub her eyes and once again she ties to open her eye lids only to find the same darkness that surrounded her when her eyes were closed.
             Silence is the next feeling that makes itself known to her, it's quiet in this darkness, her fear gives way to memories from what she thinks was a few days ago. Mommy and Daddy were yelling again. She hated when they did that.
            "It's not my fault!", Mommy would yell to Daddy.
            "You think I don't want her back too?", Daddy would sneer toward Mommy.
             She knows they was a time when they were all laughing but she can't remember about what, she only knows there was once a time they were happy.
             Then she remembered she was once happy, she thinks back to when she was running in the backyard. She loved playing in the dirt, sometimes she would find squiggly bugs that Mommy called "warns" or something that sounded like that. Here favorite part of the day was when she heard a big machine pull into the front yard and moments later Daddy would come walking in the door. He always swooped down to pick her up and give her and Mommy hugs and kisses. Some days he would have candies in his pocket to give her, those days were always special because Mommy would sigh then chuckle,"You're going to spoil her with all that candy Dear."
             "Just some sweets for the two most sweetest gals in the world!", Daddy would reply.

            She starts to feel sad, for a moment she can see those special days in front her like an tv show. The darkness starts to give way to the light of the memories of her and her parents. She reaches out to touch her Mommy and the vision turns from what looked like a tv show , to a picture, then into vapor that seeps into a little heart shaped locket that lays at her feet. She picks up the shiney locket and holds it to her heart. A tear comes down her cheek," I want my Mommy."
            Light rises from the horizon revealing something...wonderful! There are mountains and fields all filled with such pretty flowers! As the light of the world moves closer and closer she can see all the bright colors in everything around her. There is a bush near by that looks like it has roses, as she walks closer and closer she saw somethingg strange. The flowers she thought were roses were really cupcakes! She couldn't believe it!
             Everywhere she looked there was candy and cake! It was a young child's paradise. A friendly voice echoed from above her. It was a very tall man dressed in bright colors. He tells her that a world of fun and adventure awaits her. All she has to do is follow the path to the end ad he'll get everything she's always dreamed of! She tucks the locket into her pocket and skips down the path eating candy all the way!
            Some where in a children's hospital, a mother and father weep over their child who is hooked up to a life support machine," I want my baby back", the Mother cries.
            
             

Wednesday, May 22, 2013

Some things you can never go back to.

Evening Party People,
       I hope this month finds you well as you read this. As for me I have many things moving in all sorts of directions, some up some down but all in motion.
       It's Wednesday night and so far this week I've done two open mics. That's better than where I was a few months ago but I need to do more. That's not me being down on myself it's just a fact. It's kind of like exercising ..it's exactly like exercising the  more I think about it. If you have a goal of what you want your body to look like and you're about 50 lbs off then working out twice a week isn't going to cut it. The same goes for my stand up....shit I need to work out more too.><
       You ever have a fond memory of a place you've been to? Maybe it's a meadow that you played in as a child, or maybe it's a bar you and your buddies used to hang out at, what about the job you had when you first realized that you were living on your own and for the first time felt a little like an adult? I have these places too, for the most part I fear going back to those specal places because I'm afraid that the magic it once held for me wont be there when I return, and for the most part it wont.
        Those place in space in time only live in our hearts and minds, the same could be said about relationships with people. I met an old friend tonight , someone who was, for a short period of time, a close friend....meaning that we spent a lot of time together due to proximity. During that time of my life I felt there were few people I could relate with and this person was one of them. This friendship was one of those things that held a special place for me. I know this sounds sappy but it's true. When we spoke tonight it was fun and pleasant and by no means a negative experience but there was something that seemed a bit off. I think I have a selfish notion where I want people to stay the same , that way I'll always have those special feeling with me that'll last forever. It's funny, I never thought how ugly that sounded until I wrote it.
         I was bummed about it all for a few minutes then I started thinking of other relationships and friendships that have gone the same route. My ex-wife comes to mind, or my best friend back in high school. Both very important people for that place and time but like any special moment in life they pass into memory, and that's a beautiful thing.
         I'm trying to be a better person and one of the ways I'm doing this is by pulling any fault of mine out into the open. It's not about what I don't have anymore, it's about what I have as well as had. While I'll be sad from time to time about the passing of these people,places and times I'll work at being grateful that I had them at all. Who we are isn't just built by some uncontrollable roll of the genetic dice but by each moment we feel and see. Then once all those building blocks have been set it's up to us to make the most out of what life has given us, a challenge to each of us with varying degrees of difficulty, but in the end , regardless of the struggle, we all reach the same peak.
         I'm happy that I saw my friend tonight, and being happy is good enough.

Till next time Party People
Keep on a Chooglin!