Sunday, October 28, 2012

It's a lot harder staying true to yourself than Disney would have you believe

It's a lot harder staying true to yourself than Disney would have you believe. Thats what I've been having to face over this past year.

Morning Party People, it's 1 in the morning here in Tempe, outside just a few blocks away there are a few thousand college kids hooting and hollering on Mill celebrating Halloween. In a few minutes some of them will be ecstatic as they will have someone to go home with, for others it will become painfully obvious that they will be going home alone.  That feeling of reality will cause a lot of people to panic, either they will start a fight with a random stranger or perhaps they will call up an ex for a booty call, either way the next morning is bound to feel worse than this moment.

I think there's something to that awful feeling of not being included. I think a lot of us have felt that at one point or another. I was talking to Jennie today and I said sometimes I feel like life has two teams and out of all the people being picked I'm the last. The funny thing about this feeling is tht that the more I think about it I fear the more power I give it. So fuck both of the teams =D

So as some of you know I've been driving a taxi for the past few months. I've done ok at it but only ok. I know there are a lot of cabbies who do really well at this gig but holy shit am I not one of them right now. I've been working an insane amount of hours with not nearly the return I'd hope for. I think this is Gaia's way of giving me a hint. I left managing to learn to live of my creativity, which I started to do but then I got behind on my bills and have been focusing on getting back to normal. since then I have spent little or no time on doing anything creative, hell when was the last time I wrote to you guys?

So this is me picking me first for my own team, followed by my Sweetie and anyone else who feels like playing! I'm going to try and only work three to four days a week and spend the rest of the week getting DisJointed Productions back on it's feat. That's why I left Host right? I mean otherwise this would have been a colossal waste of time... =)

I listen to the Joe Rogan podcast quite a bit as I have a shit ton of time by myself in a taxi. One of the things that he says that rings true to me is that we have the power to be the hero in our own movie. This could be the day that the hero wakes up and decides to change his/her life, confronts the lesser parts of themselves and truly starts living.

Till next time Party Poeple,
Keep on a Chooglin!