Friday, December 9, 2016

Happy World Sexxxy Day everyone!

Happy Sexy Day!
           That's right, you heard me! I said Happy World Sexy Day because today is the day we celebrate the sexxxy with a triple xxxy in us all!
           "But Dave , what is World Sexy Day and how would I even take part?"
           It's simple really , today before you step out of your front door you put a little extra effort in your appearance, For some of you this means a little extra time on your eye make up, for others you might spend more than ten seconds brushing your teeth (you dirty bastards)! The point is that World Sexy Day is a day to realize that no matter what you look like or what faults you might have, wether your boney/skinny or tubby as hell, that there are people out in the world who want to bang you like a screen door in a hurricane!
           World Sexy Day is celebrating being open to the world of sexy possibilities!
           "Hey Dave, isn't this also your birthday?"
            Yes it is, I'm trying to turn it into a holiday,shut up !
Stay Sexy Party People!
#sexy #denvercomedy

Wednesday, November 30, 2016

Ok Dave, now what?

Evening Party People!
            I was sipping some tea before bed, hoping that I'll shake this sinus cold that's been lingering for a few days now. I was thinking about the next baby steps I should be taking in my life. I find it easy to jump into the well of despair when it comes to this. I can think of all the things I could have done with my life if only had made better choices in my youth. You know, like if I was someone else other than me. That's a silly thought right? If I was a different person I'm sure the one constant in both lives is my ability to take everything for granted. So let's take a different step shall we?
            At 34 I was a weak man who lied to himself as well as those he loved. I cheated non stop on my marriage and I put myself in one dangerous situation after another. I hated my life and I did everything I could to destroy it, well next to suicide anyways. These facts will never go away, these memories and the truth that comes with them are constant and can't be undone. I envy those people who have a cleaner path through this life, mainly because once you get enough dirt on you, you can never get as clean as you used to be.
           Now I know I'm not the only one who feels this way, I'm sure there are a lot of people who feel a lot worse. I don't say these things looking for sympathy, I say these things about me so that perhaps others don't feel so alone. I know at my worst I felt so unbelievable alone, I was fortunate to find other who were going through similar trials and that has been a big part of my healing ever since.
           So now I look at all things I have made myself into. I think I'm a better friend, a better boyfriend, a comic, an artist, a novice musician, a "meh" blogger, most importantly I am a person who has a much better chance of not making the same choices from years ago.
           Even though I've made so much improvement in the last six years, I feel there is another trial awaiting me. Years ago when I was a full blown addict it was due to the fact that I truly hated myself. They say addiction comes in two's and let's be honest, my second is food. I'm not going to call myself a food addict, mainly because the thought of relapsing a few times a day in order to survive sounds a little lame.
          I try to think of a scene where it isn't me who is feeding me a bunch of shitty food but some masked stranger. I do this so I can ask myself the question,"Why does this guy hate me so much?" Someone who is looking out for me would be offering food that would make my life richer and add years to my life instead of taking them away. That's the question though, why do I still hate a part of me and which part is it?
          I think it's the one part of me that I love the most and am the most afraid of, my anger. I think my anger and rage is so special, it's so unique, I'd like to think that when people think of me that it's the first thing that comes to their minds! Love or fear? What do I want, the answer depends on who is asking but for the most part , I want it all! ALL OF IT I TELL YOU!!!!
         Whoa this is all so ugly to me. This is the part of me that will ruin everything and everyone I love. Is this ambition? Is it ? I ask because my ambition is pretty intense and I feel to give in to ambition I have to give in to all of the rest.
         I get angry more often than I used to, I dream of hurting people who annoy me. Maybe I grab their face and shove the back of their head into a wall, maybe my hand is around their neck and I'm choking the life from them? Oh by the way, I am so out of shape I could not do any of this! I'm pretty weak at this point, very over weight and not as sexy as I used to be . I wonder if that's why I eat so much?
        That way I never have to confront my anger, I stay tubby and I hide from everything......
         Or.....I pick myself up and find a way to deal with the last part of me that I hate. You've put this off for far too long!

Till next time Party People
Keep on a chooglin!

Thursday, November 24, 2016

List of things to be thankful for...

Evening Party People!
          I hope you all made the most of your Thanksgiving. I'm trying to just that as I write to you all. It's been awhile since I wrote to you hasn't it? Sorry about that. I could try to come up with some crazy reason why I don't blog anymore but it all comes down to," I just gave up on it". I think it's time to change that.
          There have been exercises that I've done to make myself a better person, both physically and emotionally. I tend to stop those exercises once I start to improve myself. I guess my ego is stronger than I thought when it comes to change. Luckily, in my heart, I feel that I'm stronger.
           That brings us to what we're thankful for this year. By the way, I was going to write this on Facebook but I figured I post this list where people would want to see it...meaning you all!

1. I'm thankful I don't always post my feelings on Facebook. There are better ways to use my angst besides throwing it out into the internet.

2. Jennie! Everyone needs a Jennie in their life! She's loved and supported me in ways I hadn't thought were possible. Sometimes it's way more than I think I deserve, then again its one of the driving forces in my life that makes me want to be a better person.

3. Family, they've given me countless hours of material!

4. All of the people who listen to my podcast! Every now and then someone tells me how they enjoy the show. Sometimes it's people who find it entertaining, sometimes they love hearing the stories of such interesting people who have been on.

5. Self awareness. I won't say that I'm 100% self-aware, if I were then I'd be a much nicer person. I'm grateful that I'm more self aware than I was pre-comedy.

6. Denver Comedy scene! You guys mean a lot to me.

            There are many other things I could go on about but at this point, my mind is starting to wander. One of the exercises I've been doing is "The Morning Pages". If you don't know what those are I suggest you read The Artist's Way. One of the things that I've been learning is that there is an old hurdle in my path that I'm not going to be able to get around. It's the last thing my ego clings to, it tells me that this thing is my greatest asset in my soul, it says my anger makes me invincible! Like it's some type of superpower that will fix all of my problems when it's needed. Sounds like a load of shit doesn't it?
             This time next year I hope to be thankful that I spent the last year confronting my anger, to see it for what it is, to learn to live with it and not in fear of it. This seems like a good journey to take, doesn't it?

Till nest time Party People,
Keep on a Chooglin!!

Sunday, May 8, 2016

Happy Mother's Day!

                Yesterday was angry mom day at work, a day where nothing is good enough and where the activity of the day was spreading misery amongst as many service people as possible. Today is going to be better! There is only one Mom on the planet that I love , she means more to me than five of all of you. She is an inspiration and a testament to growth as a person and as a Mom. She is the only Mom I love....the rest of you bitches can get bent. Seriously the next lady who talks down to me or any of my co-workers like their less than human will get to watch me beat the shit out of their kids while they recoil in terror. I know that's harsh, you may wonder how I could be so mean, well I learned from the best, one of many reasons I love my mom so much grin emoticon Seriously , I have a book of matches and some lighter fluid and I will set this whole Mother's day on fire if I have to! In the meantime, listen to one of my crowning achievements in my life, not graduating from AMDA, not being on TV, but sitting down and recording a wonderful conversation with my Mom, Margarita Germain .

Monday, March 21, 2016

The One Thing I don't Want to Do

Morning Party People!
             It's Monday , it's 9:30, I have my coffee, it's time to write!
             First off I'd like to say sorry for not writing to you all more often. Discipline is something that I need to work on, if only I were more disciplined to do it. All lame jokes aside this month has been pretty scary.
             At the beginning of the year I made a goal to move from an open mic comic to a showcase comic. Since January I've gotten myself booked on a few shows, done a few competitions and now I'm even producing a show of my own. So if anything I took a few baby steps this year, a few more than I thought I would have anyways.
            So what about any of this is scary? It's not like I'm afraid of success the same way I'm afraid of getting hit by a car every day right? It's not the success I fear, it's who I'll be when I get there.
            I'm a very egotistical person. It's not something I'm proud of and I hate admitting it but I am. I'm also very competitive, that's something I try very hard NOT to be, because it brings out the worst in me. So is this a necessary evil , an obstacle I can't ignore anymore, or both?
            Like with most things that run through my skull , it's never just one thing. For example I remember growing up in Lucerne , I found out that the smart kids didn't have a lot of friends. I found this out around the time I was in Junior High. So in order to make friends I dumbed down . I wanted to fit in, I didn't want to be alone, a normal reaction in order to adapt to an environment. It worked, I had friends in Junior high and when I went to High School in another town I was lucky to make friends where I didn't have to pretend I wasn't smart. The sad thing is, if you tell a human being something for long enough,eventually they believe it. Since those days I've been trying to figure out the line is, the one where I've been pretending to be something else or the one where the real me actually is.
            I love the Denver Comedy Scene, there's nowhere else in the world I'd rather be to work on my stand-up. I love the Denver Comics, I've made some really good friends and have met so many awesome people. Truth be told I want to outshine every single last one of them. Every show that's in town I want to outdraw them. I want success and I don't want anyone to get in my way. This is the part of me I don't like. I'm afraid I'm going to say or do something that will hurt my friends. I know I'm capable of this because I've done it once before.
            My senior year in High school I brushed off my closest friends to I could focus on my AMDA audition. I really hurt my best friends at the time. To this day I'm sorry I hurt them but I'm not sorry for what  did. AMDA was life or death for me and I know I made the right decision but holy smokes do I wish I found another way to do it.
            So maybe that's my answer? I'll be careful and calm moving forward but with the knowledge that I'll make mistakes. I've done it before and have grown as a person every time since then. Hell, what was the point of being a boss for so many years if I'm not going to use the lessons I learned?
            Ok enough random thoughts, I have a bunch of baby steps to make today, jokes to write, flyers to post, I'm also pretty sure I need to take the trash out as well. Far all the troubles that may come my way I know that I'm a better person now that when I started this blog, I thank you all for being there along the way.

Till Next Time Party People
Keep on a Chooglin!

Friday, January 1, 2016

New Year New Goals

What's Shakin Party People!
            It's a brand new year in case you haven't been on the internet.  Some of you might say,"So what? Who cares?"
            I get it, for years that's how I felt about New Year's Eve. I didn't change for me until I got older. At my age now I feel like I don't have as many New Year's ahead of me than I do behind me. That's not to be melancholy, that's just being honest about how I feel. So being melancholy is only a small part of it.
            Last year I decided to break my 1995 resolution to not make any more resolutions. It was a tough choice for me at the time because I had a hell of a streak going. On the other hand I had never made a resolution to improve myself and when 2015 was looming around the corner I figured out not doing anything wasn't the best way to grow into who I wanted to be. I did great things be breaking that resolution. I got better in my stand-up and in doing so I got better at living my life. My relationship with Jennie has grown in ways that I never thought possible and as a result I'm finding a happiness that I never knew existed. The awesome part of it all is I know that this is only the beginning.
          So what's next for 2016?
          I'm going to put myself in uncomfortable situations this year. Way more than I did in 2015. As much as I hate feeling uncertain about any situation the only time I've grown as a person was by doing so. Ego has a way into telling me to play it safe, to go with what has worked in the past. I know it means well but last year I learned to move past that. So this year I will put myself in more situations that could end in rejection, I will hear "NO" more times this year than last. I will get on my showcases this year, I will be rejected by more showcases as well as crowds this year. I know it will hurt, but I know I will be better for it when all is said and done.
           When it comes to comedy I tend to play it safe way too much. There were bars and shows that I avoided last year, well I'm not going to do that this year. I got a taste of improvement last year and now I'm addicted son!
           I have a workout to do so I'm going to wrap this up, in closing (sets mic stand back center stage) thanks for everything everybody, and yes you in particular. I started this blog and my podcast in the hopes I might accidentally become a better person because of it and I can now see from where I started that it's finally happening, thanks for being a part of it!
           Till next time Party People,keep on a chooglin!