Monday, November 26, 2012

The Longmont Files: Day 4 A New Snoozy Day

Morning Party People!   
    I find I’m sleeping in more and more over this past week, maybe this vacation is starting to set in. Who knows, all I can tell at this point is that Jennie’s family are super great and I’m having a lot of fun in ways that don’t involve video games,liquor or the internet. Yes it boggles my mind as well.
    Yesterday was a much happier day as it didn’t involve any religious services or over priced bistros. To be honest all I did yesterday was sleep, my body hasn’t acclimated to this altitude just yet so breathing tended to get kind of difficult which is why I stayed in bed most of the day. It sucks really, knowing there’s a whole city out there to get to know but all I could do is sleep. At least I had Jennie to snuggle with.
    When we did venture out of the house we went to the market to get some supplies for tonights dinner. I’m excited about it as we’re making gluten free pizza which is one of my specialties. I forget the name of the store we were in but it was the same as Fry’s back in AZ. The biggest difference was over here the store was chock full of white people. It’s so funny to me when I get nervous about that. I guess working with so many cultures and people that when I’m around only one I think something ominous is approaching. Damn liberals must have gotten to me.
    One of the biggest trips for me has been one of the things I’ve been trying not to write about. Jennie’s niece and nephew as well as their parents. These kids are so smart and so nice and wonderful and yet they are raised in a manner that is so foreign to me that I still find it a little jarring. Now keep in mind that there is nothing wrong with this family or how they run it, nothing at all. I think in my mind they way I was raised is the only logical way to raise a kid, pure ego right? That’s what I’m finding anyways. I was raised by a fairly strict Mexican upbringing. If you don’t know what that is , it’s very similar to how any lower class family raises their kids only when your mom gets pissed she swears in Spanish.
    There was a lot of ridicule in our house, a lot of love mind you but there was a lot of harshness to go with it. I guess my parents thought that this world is a tough place so they wanted their kids to be equally tough. This meant a lot of tough love, stern gazes telling us to take the pain of whatever was hurting us, to make are hearts like ice when we needed them to be. I wont say that these traits haven't helped me in this life but now I think I might have lost something along the way.
    What I see in this house are two parents that dedicate their lives to loving these kids. They love so openly and with out apology or shyness thats it’s a little overwhelming for me to see. I’m just not used to seeing it. So where does that leave me? With a lot of questions thats where!
    I think I need to open my heart and mind , to what? To love and forgiveness, forgiveness of being vulnerable, forgiveness for caring  and a forgiveness for all the things I keep hidden about how I feel about this world.
    If anything I’m grateful for seeing a new way to do things, a new way to live, a new way to love. Today would have been Jennie’s Moms birthday. Sadly she passed a way over a year ago. I know this is going to be a tough day for her, I’m going to be there for her as much as I can and with a little luck, just a bit more so.
    Till next time Party People ,
    Keep on a Chooglin!

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